"You did it!"
"Enjoy it while you can, it's the best time of your life."
"I wish I could go back."
"What do you want to do afterwards?"
These, and many others, are questions that have recently permeated my structured, comfortable bubble. Adulthood lingers over me like smog does to Salt Lake. Unfortunately I don't think taking shorter showers and carpooling is going to make my transition into the real world any easier. Am I excited for no more pointless memorization and boring lectures? Well duh. But does college beat the alternative? The reactions and advice I've received from some people make me wonder whether I should take up another degree, move back into the dorms, roll around in student debt and avoid growing up altogether. As appealing as reliving my freshman year sounds, I'd rather stumble into the abyss of uncertainty...at least it'll be something new.
Up until now my life has been mapped out. Knowing the outcome of my future and the consequences of my decisions gives my inner control aficionado a sense of peace. Because nothing is more fun than planning every single detail of your life, right? Wrong. In my 21 years of experience, the best and most memorable moments just happen. Naturally. Spontaneously. Without orchestration. I like to think the universe has much bigger things to worry about than my lack of happy-go-lucky-ness but do trust that the universe has my back and that everything falls into place. The art of letting go is very hard for anxiety-ridden people like me but I'm grateful for those in my life who help me realize it's all gonna work out; most of the time by inducing gut-wrenching laughter.
In 13 days I will dress like a Hogwart's professor and receive a piece of paper that declares my worth. It's a good thing I can crack a joke and literally dance like no one is watching, otherwise strangers might think a "B.S. in Communications" is my sole defining quality. If college taught me anything, it's that I am worth so much more than that piece of paper. I am a colorful combination of the people around me. I am a lover of naps and deep conversations. I am a product of my selfless mother and ambitious father. I am loyal to few but kind to all. I am easily distracted. I am emotionally invested. I am an ever-changing human, creating myself day by day.
Cheers to the ups and the downs.
Cheers to the unknown.
Cheers to love.
Cheers to a beautiful world.
Cheers to the winsome uncertainty of life.
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